Monday, January 28, 2008

Words to Live By...

Grant me, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope of finally embracing you. - Thomas Aquinas

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Communicating to the belly

I’m fairly certain now, I’ve felt you kick me not once but twice, Baby Bean.

The most definite time was when I was lying in bed getting ready to finally roll myself out of bed. Dad was in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He let out a loud hack and the lower part of my belly jumped. You weren’t keen on that.

The second time was while I was at work. I was sitting at my desk, Indian style (thank goodness for large desks). I was typing along when you tapped my lower right side a few times.

Are you trying to tell me something Bean?

I’ve been thinking a lot about reading to you, Bean. A doctor in the department I work for was kind enough to do a scan for me Tuesday night (01.22) and he showed me how developed your ears are. I suppose it’s time now to start reading to you. What would you like to hear first? I figure I’ll head to the bookstore and pick up a few books.

I also got my first bout of nausea for no apparent reason last night on the bus ride home. I had to take my time at the bank and grocery store to avoid getting sick inside the stores. I was afraid I was catching something. I went home and felt worse after dinner so I just went to bed. Your dad was so sweet. I woke up at 1am and he said I sounded better already. I guess I must have been really out of it.

Bean, I have a such a… Scratch that. Your dad has such a great story for you. It makes me cry thinking about it. I’ll share it with you in writing soon. You’ll have to wait just a bit longer but trust me you will not forget this one.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Generation Gap #1

1. Why do you have to go see the doctor every month? In my day we saw the doctor every 3 months then every 3 weeks. – Mom

2. So you are 4 months as of January 1st. – MIL
No, I’m 16 weeks as of this past Friday. – pg
But that’s not the first of the month. – MIL
Exactly. -- MIL

3. Why do you have to have all these tests? - Mom
It’s standard testing. – pg
Not when I had you. What do you learn from these tests anyway? – Mom
That the baby is ok and that the pregnancy is going as planned. – pg
I don’t understand. – Mom

4. I didn’t know what to do when he would cry because of the colic so I just cried with him. – MIL

5. I can give you your old crib and mattress. – Mom
Mom, that’s nice but safety standards have changed since the 70’s. – pg

6. Don’t get too many tests and sonograms. They’ll harm the baby. – MIL

7. When are you getting another sonogram? I'd like to be there. -- Mom

8. We didn't have sonograms back then. We sort of just did what we were told. -- Mom

9. I still don't understand. You have to see the doctor every month? -- Mom

Who are you? Your dad really wants to know.

It was a pretty stressful day today, Bean.

With all the car stuff and home stuff to deal with we headed to the doctor's pretty stressed.

Dad was hoping to see if you are a boy bean or a girl bean but you weren't having it. You sure do like sitting Indian style. I guess you want to to wait a bit more.

I think he was a bit upset about that.
Hopefully I can schedule our level II sonogram on a date he can make it maybe just maybe you'll reveal yourself.

I saw your spine which completely blew me away. I also saw your umbilical cord and your bone structure.

You look pretty good in my opinion. You've got this big belly too. It's really cute.

I'm going to try to schedule the level II so that your dad can be there. I think he was a bit disheartened and said that I shouldn't schedule it based on his schedule but I want him to be there.

It's not just to determine the sex. The scan checks out your brain, heart, spine, kidneys, organs and limbs. The placenta will be checked for its position and they will measure you to make sure you are growing normally.

Oh, I saw the bottoms of your feet. Your toes are so cute.

Anywho, I figure the doctor's appointment is pretty boring for your dad so I'll go to the next one by myself but if I can get the level II scan on a date your dad can make it, he may not appreciate it now, but I think he will later.

Maybe it's more for me. Who knows. I just think it would be nice to have both your mom and dad see the detailed scan.

Nevertheless, your dad videotaped today's sonogram. I think he'll be playing with it the next few days. I think it was a dress rehearsal for the big sonogram.

Image to come...

Saturday, January 19, 2008

16 weeks flew by...

I’m at 16 weeks. The ligament pain the doctor said I’d experience started on the money. It’s a sharp pain usually on one side. When it happens, it scares the bejesus out of you. I’ve learned it happens when I get up fast or change positions quickly. I’m trying to ease myself now.
I also notice that if I stay in one position for a prolonged period of time, especially seated, my belly hurts a bit. I learned this yesterday at work. I think that, my stockings which weren’t tight but I was paranoid and my measly 16 ounces of water caused my discomfort.
I’m spending the day today in bed with my legs elevated and avoiding the smell of spackling, paint and cigarettes outside in my foyer. Our handyman wanted to work today because he missed a day due to illness last week. I have no problem with this except my sense of smell has skyrocketed and the cigarette smell is nauseating.
I’m avoiding the toxic smells of paint and spackle by locking myself in the bedroom. Your dad is doing a bunch of errands today. See, our car got broken into. He filed a report. Our entire bottom front panel was stolen. Other than that, all is ok. They were going to swab the blood found in the car but since the damage is all but covered with our insurance he opted out of it and moved onto cleaning the car so he cans drive you and I safely.
He called the insurance company and all auto glass shops are booked until Monday. So we’re parking it in the garage and leaving it there until Monday.
Aside from the pain and the spidey sense of smell, I also noticed I’m more congested. I blow my nose a lot. I haven’t had any weird cravings aside from the 4 ounces of orange soda I had yesterday. I suppose it’s still early for big cravings.
I’m still trying to figure out what movements are you, Baby Bean, and which movements are simply gas. I know that doesn’t make sense and when you read this you’ll think your mom is a nut but I’ve never had a human being live inside me before. Cut me some slack.
Around 1:15pm today I felt a little tap shifting for a few seconds. It didn’t feel like anything I felt before . Was that you saying hi?
When I told the doctors I work with about you many were very supportive and gave me great advice. I feel very fortunate and lucky to have great docs freely give me advice. It made me feel very good after a very long day.
Your dad is very excited about our doctor’s appointment on Monday. He is anxious to see you again and maybe get to know you a bit more. I’m nervous and excited as usual. This time I think dad will try to videotape it.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Things you should know about your parents part I

1. Your parents laugh a lot. We find things in life generally funny. Your dad laughs quietly and turns beet red. Your mom laughs vociferously. This embarrasses your dad sometimes.

2. Your dad is a night owl. He says it’s because he was born at 3:30am. Your mom loves sleep. She’s not a day person or a night person. I’m not sure how that correlates to when I was born. Your mom was born at 7:30pm.

3. Your dad researches stealthily and makes decisions which seem impulsive. Your mom weighs everything but generally returns to her gut instinct.

4. Your mom and dad both think feet are their least favorite body part.

5. Your mom will generally try anything at least once. Your dad is a bit more reserved.

6. Your mom and dad are both highly opinionated. Your dad will say what’s on his mind matter of factly. Your mom, who was raised by conservative grandparents & liberal parents from a then British colony, will speak her mind but try to do so deftly.

7. Your mom and dad like cartoons and old movies.

8. Your dad is very observant. Your mom is less so which irks your dad very much.

9. Your dad has no sense of direction and has named the GPS. Your mom has a strong sense of direction and often find the GPS takes longer routes much to her chagrin.

10. Your dad is not a worrier. He takes things in stride. Your mom worries and plans for things. She’s a bit compulsive about planning.

Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who?

Bean, today I keep wondering what you are like and who you might be. Are you more like your dad? Man, I hope so. A doppelganger of myself is scary. Will you have the same sense of humor as us? Will silly things make you laugh the way your mom laughs? Will it be loud and boisterous like me or quiet but face reddening like your dad? Will you have freckles? Will you have my long earlobes? Will you inquisitive and a researcher? Will you be a impulsive or weigh ever option? Will you grow taller than me? I hope so. Will you enjoy sleep as much as your mom or will you be a night owl like your dad?

So many questions. So many unknowns.

I have secret wishes for you. Wishes, I know I have no control over but that’s what wishes are, hopes and dreams for you. I feel selfish for wishing them. Sometimes I feel selfish for including them in my prayers so often. I know I should be happy and prayerful of your health but I suppose as a mom, or a mom-to-be, I can’t help but have desires for you.

By the way, it is totally ok not to laugh at daddy’s puns. He does it a lot. It’s cute but sometimes they’re too much.

Monday, January 14, 2008

I'm a Mini Cooper incubating a Mini mini Cooper

I spent the afternoon wallowing. I've been pretty proud of my belly. I know it's bigger than most woman's belly's at 14 weeks but the doc told me that it's normal for a short, petite, short torso woman.
Outside of work, I’m loving my belly. I’m hugging and rubbing my belly. I may even flaunt it. At work, I’m a bit more self conscious. I’m not sure why.
Today during lunch a friend, and she means well said, “Wow, you are getting big.” Then I spoke to my mom and she said for the umpteenth time, “You are really big for your dates.”
Now images of me as a rollie pollie are stuck in my head. If I look like this at 14 weeks what the heck am I going to look like at 42 weeks?
Should I hold off on the extra cheese on my cracker? Should I reduce my pasta? Should I slow down on the potatoes my bean loves so much?
“Remember, this is the time to enjoy the fact you can eat whatever you want. Ok, whatever is safe for the baby but that includes a lot of things, “ my husband said.
Why do I care so much what people think of what I look like now? I feel like I’m in junior high school again.
I went home feeling a bit conflicted. Yes, I want the best for my baby. I am incubating it. I should feed my body appropriately. But, maybe I’m going to gain 60 lbs like Goldie Hawn’s kid. What if I do that? I don’t have a personal trainer to help me lose it. Would it be fair to deny myself food because I think I’m gaining too much too quickly? What if the nausea and light headedness kicks in again? That’s got to be my body telling me I should fuel up. Why else would it give me those symptoms?
I went to my trusty humor book to keep me in perspective. A Girlfriend’s Guide to Pregnancy isn’t on my bookshelf to provide me much information but more as a reality check when the pregnancy insanity kicks in.
I reread the section on weight gain and exercise. I will admit that I did say that once the 3 month haze lifted I’d be back at the gym like she did. Then I had that scare with the discharge that totally freaked me out. During the first month, I kept my routine of daily 1 hour sessions at the gym. Well, days after I’d get a lot of scary stuff coming out of me. The doc told me to cut back on the gym and hold off until he ok’d it.
That wasn’t hard as 1) the weather got colder, 2) I was so tired, I could barely make it home sometimes and 3) I was so darn scared of the discharge.
Two months pass and he green lights me to head back to the gym. I’d love to get that feeling I get when I finish a nice workout but now I’m scared. I wasn’t a power gym-er. I didn’t lift 20 lb weights and do 80 pushups but I did like the treadmill and bike. I even liked sit-ups and crunches but I stopped those immediately when I found out I was pregnant. I’m just terrified I might do something I shouldn’t.
Anyway, Vicki Iovine wrote, “From one little egg that you have had in your body since you were born, and one little sperm that your husband manufactured on the spur of the moment, you are expected to create an entire person. I’m talking arms, legs, heart, lungs, eyelashes and your uncle Harry’s big ears. If you don’t think that can be tiring, then you are a pretty invincible woman, and not someone I yearn to spend much time with.”
That one line made me laugh so hard, I felt better and less self conscious. Heck, I’m making a human being in my tiny 5’3” body. What the heck should people expect? I’m a compact car and I’ve got to shift things to make room for a baby inside me. Yes, it’s only 14 weeks but where the heck am I supposed to fit my intestines, bladder, stomach and uterus? Something has got to give and for me it starts with my waist. Yes, I look like all round and ball-like but that’s my organs making room.
I felt a bit better about myself.
Then I went to the bathroom. Ok, remember, I said I didn’t know how much I’d be willing to share? Well, apparently, I have no shame now. I just finished dropping kids off at the pool when for a brief, the briefest of brief, moments, I felt like something was tapping around my belly button. I’m not talking gas bubbly, I’m talking like something inside flicked my belly button. Then it stopped.
Was that you Bean? Holy cow, was my first sensation of you in a bathroom? It was the weirdest feeling. I could be wrong and it could just be gas or shifting of my organs or even stretching but it felt like a flick. I’m pretty sure nothing has ever flicked me from inside of myself before.
I’ll speak to my doc again about my growing belly but I’m going to try to forget the self conscious pre-teen pg and just enjoy the entire ride. Everybody is made differently and I should be happy for my growing belly. I mean, it’s holding one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

First public pregnancy moment

I had dinner with friends on Friday. 20 minutes after I went to the bathroom at the restaurant, I had to go again. We passed a Borders on 34th so I ran in and went to the loo. As I was peeing what seemed like the Nile river, I let out a sneeze and mid-sneeze I tooted.
Yes, I multi-tasked myself into peeing, sneezing and tooting at the same time, in public, with other women in the bathroom.
The shock at my fantastic feat took me and I wound up laughing in silence for about 2 minutes inside my stall. The silence was deafening in the bathroom. The chatter stopped. The peeing stopped. All I heard was me muffling my laughter as I sat there wondering if I should just get up and go or wait ‘til everyone left.
I suppose pregnancy and the no shame-spill-everything-to-everyone rule kicked in because I proudly strutted out of the stall, washed my hands and walked right out of the bathroom with my head held high.
I think my saving grace was my friend was not in the bathroom at the time of my amazing feat.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

I did not know... Part I

... the sheer bliss I'd feel of being able to relieve gas in the privacy of my office.

... how delicious and repulsive things could taste.

... how emotional I could get over simple words, phrases and photographs.

... the wonderful reactions I would get from my brother. His expression was reminiscient of an expression he would make when he was curious and excited as a little boy.

... how emotional a grandmom-to-be could get over a daughter's pregnancy.

... how bonds between a woman could tighten/weaken because of a pregnancy.

... how hard it would be to allow oneself to enjoy maternity clothes.

... how many superstitions and old wives tales there are about pregnancy.

... how people will never react the way you think they will react. Some may even react negatively or pessimistically.

... how matter of fact opinions can change suddenly.

... how a husband can just as easily go from shock to apprehensions to father before his offspring is born.

... how supportive and calming a husband can be.

... how unsupportive and aggravating a husband can be.

... how comfortable panel pants can be.

... how much structure plays a role in my feedings and the happiness of the belly.

... how messy I could live without breaking out into hives.

... how priorities shift suddenly without regret.

... how much love I could feel for someone I haven't seen yet outside of grainy sonograms.

... how the sound of my child's heartbeat can cause the tearducts to burst open.

... how my husband would react to the first sounds of our baby's heartbeating.

... how my husband would react to the first images of our baby moving around.

... how musical my rear could be.

... how worried yet confident things will work on I could be.

... how people would ask the most private questions/awkward questions without regard.

... how open and free I would answer/share the most private/awkward questions.

Little Human, Big Gear

I’m starting to read about what equipment we’ll need for you, Baby Bean. We bought a book to help us with weed through the massive amount of manufacturers of baby gear. It looks to be 600 page big.

You’re dad is skeptical and thinks we should just research and wing it but I think it doesn’t hurt to reference this book. Most parents suggest this book.

I also started reading about your speech development. I didn’t know that your larynx doesn’t drop until later in life which is why you don’t come out reciting poetry immediately.

I actually find the development books and videos much more interesting than the shopping for gear books and videos. I guess that makes me different than most moms. I’m sort of deferring that to your dad. I just can’t fathom myself dealing with researching and buying gear, fixing the house, packing and cleaning the house and incubating you at the same time.

There was a time when multi-tasking was second nature to me. I’ve learned early on, I can’t do that anymore, at least not for now. There is too much for me to do but I just don’t have the endurance or physical stamina to do it now.

Something simple as cooking dinner for us has become a chore. I like cooking too. Ask anyone but the handling or raw meat for prolonged periods, which include actual cooking, gets me dizzy and light headed.

I have learned that pork chops are a good thing for you. You seem to like pork chops. It’s the one food I can cook and eat happily.

I’ve noticed that I get a little throat tightness when I take the prenatal vitamins now. The smell lingers in my throat and gets me a little nauseous.

My tummy is also tightening a bit and I’m noticing my bladder fills quicker. How’s life in the womb? Is it comfy? Are you warm? Are you getting the nutrients you want? What’s your thoughts for dinner tonight?

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

You thought telling your parents was nerve racking

I’m very nervous.

I scheduled a meeting with my director today to inform him of the good news. I’ve never had to tell someone I needed leave before so this is a bit scary.

I’m prepared my written proposal for leave and return to work and have had a friend/mentor review it. I’ve calculated additional time just in case because I heard it’s better to ask for more than less. I’ve practiced (sort of) what I’m going to say. I’m still petrified.

Does everyone feel this way?
My director’s assistant called this morning to cancel my meeting. I shocked her with my insistent request for a meeting with him today before he leaves for a business trip. With the help of a friend I calmed down and was able to get a meeting with him.
He’s running late. Oh, cruel ……..
He’s back.
My knees were shaking but I did it. I told them that I found a way to have staff cut from the same cloth as myself but they’d have to wait a few months for incubation and 20+ years to fully ripen. They seemed happy. I have to negotiate some points with them but we’ll see what they put on the table.
I feel relieved it’s out but also nervous about negotiations but I suppose that’s normal. I couldn’t do this without helpful advice from friends and mentors. Women really do help women which is another reason I believe men could never be pregnant. There was a reason for God’s plan.

The Mommy Feeling...

Bean, I’ve learned my lesson. You don’t like the idea of seeing your dinner raw. Last night was the second time I felt nauseous and downright put off by my dinner. This has happened twice, once while preparing raw chicken and now while I was preparing to make hamburgers.

You love meat and protein. You can’t get enough of cheese and read meat and pork. You just don’t like to see it in it’s pre-cooked state, I suppose.

What am I supposed to do now? Your dad has offered to follow my instructions to make dinner. I spent the rest of the night eating string beans while dad munched on burgers and fries.

Bean, I think your dad has been hit with the dad bug. This week, he started nonchalantly telling his friends that he’s a dad/pop/daddy/father. He even said some things on separate occasions to family members that made me weepy. You are one lucky baby to have a dad like your daddy. He’s ready to do whatever to give you what you need and protect you.

I hope you grow up to be like him, a strong, supportive, compassionate and loving person. You’ve got his appetite.

I wonder when I’m going to hit the mommy bug. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve found myself hugging my belly around loud noises and unpleasant events on the street. I’m watching everything I eat and being extra careful walking around and doing chores. I can’t watch a show where a kids gets hurt without crying and getting angry. I’m researching good pediatricians and schools and nurseries. I’m doing a lot of ‘mom’ like things but I don’t feel like the mom bug has hit yet. I just feel so unprepared. Is it something that just happens? Is it a feeling?

I feel a change in what's important to me and what really matters now, is that part of the change? Am I going to one day see 'mom' officially blazed on my letter jacket? How does this work? Do I lose my identity as pantrygirl and become 'mom'? I'm not saying that's good or bad just curious.

Saturday, January 05, 2008

If you can burp, you're not choking

One last thing, never ever eat an apple while talking to your brother, laughing hysterically while discussing the subject of gas.

Holy crap, apple bits down the wrong pipe is not funny yet when you're sitting next to your brother talking about gas, it seems to be.

I think I really scared my brother and mother. Tears were streaming through my eyes and I couldn't breathe but figured if I could cough, laugh and burp, I'd be okay eventually.

Hope you weren't too scared Bean.

At one point, I burped out something that sounded like Eep Opp Ork Ah Ah!

Who better to understand mom-to-be insanity

Yesterday, I spent the day with my mom. During Christmas supper, she said she wanted to take me shopping for maternity clothes. It turned into not only a shopping excursion but a day I spent with my mom and brother, something I haven’t had the opportunity to have in a very long time.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my stepdad and my husband but there is something very nice about spending time with my mom and brother alone even if my brother was home sick. It’s sad how life can fly by and make small things like eating a meal together rare. Between my brother’s work, my work, our personal lives, my mom’s personal life and overall responsibilities, simple ordinary get-togethers are extremely rare.
Anywho, we left early enough to avoid traffic. The first store we hit was Motherhood Maternity. I didn’t make it past the initial display rack when the sales lady turned to me and my mom and said, “Well, you finally brought her here with you!” “Good grief, mom, how many people did you tell?” “Just a few.”
This is what I learned at Motherhood Maternity, their stuff is expensive and not always of best quality but you get to stuff a pillow in your pants to see what you’ll look like in 3 months. Oh, I also learned my ass grows during pregnancy and that I may need a weightlifter’s like belt to hold my belly up. Are you kidding me? That thing did not look comfortable at all.
I wound up buying a brown blazer for work and some underwear. Mom seemed to lean towards the granny panties but I told her until the belly warrants it, my husband will appreciate the bikini kind. Did you know they sell thong maternity panties? Thong! I wore thongs before . They’re great to avoid pantylines but thongs don’t seem the ideal panty for pregnant woman. 1. To give you TMI, during the first trimester, it’s not like you’re going to be avoiding the feminine napkin aisle. Some women are lucky but most will need some type of panty liner for a few weeks as the tot cleans out his/her new digs. 2. As the day progresses, you feel more and more pregnant. By 4pm, I feel like I have a melon sitting in my stomach. This effectively causes my pants to ride up a bit. It’s not very comfortable as it is but then you add a piece of cloth that naturally resides in the crack and you’re constantly feeling as if you’ve got a wedgie.
Moving on, mom has an eye for some great bargains. Old Navy had a great selection and mom found me 2 pairs of pants on the clearance rack for $8 a piece! I left with 1 tank, 1 top and 2 pairs of pants! Total cost for shopping was less than $65!
We went back to my mom’s and she helped me hem my pants. My brother and I ate and chatted with mom about her pregnancy and Chinese superstitions regarding pregnancy. Mom shared her labor stories and I asked her about misconceptions or surprises regarding pregnancy and babies she had with both of us. She mentioned that when she was pregnant with me it was a given that you’d be uncomfortable for 9+ months. “You just didn’t think anything was out of the ordinary or different so you didn’t speak about that stuff.” I forget how different times were.
On the baby front, she was surprised at the high frequency of jaundice. I read somewhere the frequency increases in Asian babies so I made a note to ask my doc about this at my next visit. As far as I know there really isn’t a preventative measure one can take. If anyone knows of one, feel free to share.
We continued to talk about her family and stories of pregnancy and baby rearing while she prepared dinner. Then all three of us had dinner together. My stepdad had to work late so we started without him. I think my mom really liked that. My mom rarely eats but I noticed today that she devoured her lunch with me and she ate more than usual at dinner. I took it as a sign that she really was enjoying herself. I was too.
In the end, my mom left me with a ton of clementines and some of her fresh soup for the baby. She thinks it’s important that the Bean have fresh slow cooked broths and soups to help development. My belly isn’t protesting! We’ve made an arrangement to see each other once a week so she can give me another pot of fresh soup.
Mom did leave me with some good advice. I told her about my apprehensions about Grandmoms taking over the house and child rearing. She kindly said to me the most important thing to remember is that Grandmoms want nothing but to love their grandchildren and would never intentionally hurt them. “Don’t ever shut out Grandparents because they are overbearing. You need to be strong and put your foot down. Tell them, however hard it is, how you would like to raise your child. We may not be happy or agree but most of us remember being in the same situation without parents. With my parents, I couldn’t talk back or dispute but with your generation, you can and should.”
I hope my mom remembers that. I know this is a tricky situation that can harm relationships. I don’t think I’d ever shut out grandparents, especially since I’ve had a such a close relationship with mine.
Mom kind of alluded to how she wanted to get us something and that she felt she wasn’t doing enough for us but I tried to convey to her that she’s doing more than she knows. At this point my mom is my turn to person for nesting. I’m not physically nesting now but I’ve been wanting to hear more and more about her relationship with her mom, her pregnancy and her fears and surprises about being a mom. I take all of it knowing times have changed and superstitions she believes don’t have to be my beliefs. Still, it’s comforting and when I tell her about new tests or fears and apprehensions or just pregnancy insanities that I experience, I know she doesn’t always get it but she seems eager to hear it. Strangely enough, it feels better to share with someone the idiotic worries and crazies that accompany pregnancy without judgment or advice.
I need to remind my mom how much she’s doing for me. It’s not how much financially you give that is the defining factor. Mom, you do more than you know. Heck, without you, this usually stable woman wouldn’t be strong enough to be a mom-to-be. Thank you and hope somehow I can let you know this.

Thursday, January 03, 2008


Bean, how are the accommodations? Occasionally, I get a stretchy feeling sort of like pulling. Is that you requesting more space? That doesn’t bother me as much as the pulling I feel sometimes when I sneeze or blow my nose. I’m afraid I’m hurting you because it feels like a sharp quick tightening as if I’ve pulled something.
I hope you’re comfortable in there as it’s 19 degrees outside. Even the dogs are a bit chilled outside. I hope you take plenty of naps for your mom because she hasn’t had a chance and will not for awhile. Between work and home stuff (I’ll share with you later), your dad and I have a laundry list of things to do to prepare for your coming. I’m not sure if it’s possible, but I’d like the big stuff to be completed before my third trimester.
I don’t know if we can do it all but we’re going to try our best.