Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Neverending shortage of Mom guilt


I'm hitting a point where I really can't run or chase my toddler and it makes me feel awful.
I want to have the energy and strength to run around with my toddler but my lungs are being pushed up into me and chasing an energetic child is harder.
I feel bad because now I'm depending more on others and that's not something I'm comfortable with.
Ever since I was little and my dad said to do what I can and try not to depend or bother others, it's kind of stuck in me to learn and do without burdening.  I know my dad probably didn't mean it as literal and was trying to deal with the madness at the time but it's stuck.  (You gotta love childhood memories.)
So now I want to try to spend some time with my #1 before #2 comes and I find myself needing help from others to do some of the things that she's accustomed to.
I try very hard not to say, "Your sibling is growing and Mama can't really do <blank>." though.  I don't want to start that whole, because of so and so, this.
Sometimes I try to say, Mama's belly is growing bigger and it's getting harder for Mama to run or pick things up or what not.  I hope she understands.