TG still nurses but mainly at naptimes and bedtime. We've naturally fallen into this routine. Sometimes we still have a nip during the day but nowadays she doesn't request it unless we are home. I never really restricted her to home nursing but it has just fallen into place.
I was worried for a moment about transitioning to this. How would I feel denying her or telling her no milk? I didn't have to really. I have said,"When we get home, honey." a handful of times but usually I did because I knew she really just wanted comfort which I could give her in other ways and/or we were someplace where I couldn't freely nurse without disrobing or unpackig the Sherpa accoutrements.
What has changed in the past week is a reduction in pumping. Either I was too busy or the output is low.
So far it seems to be ok as she's fallen asleep in the car most days these past few weeks.
I think the low production is due to stress and a reduction in caloric intake.
It's kind of bittersweet for me right now. A month ago my breastpump died on me. I now use a hospital grade pump available a my office. I thought I'd freak but I didn't. It seemed natural and I knew Hans and Franz would need to move onto better pastures at some point.
Now I've only brought home 2.5 ounces this week and I'm sort of ok with it.
I know at this point it's not nutrients but comfort and immunities she's getting from my milk. I think that's a big reason why I'm not totally panicking.
More importantly I think I'm ready to take control of my body again. What I mean is although I'm no ready to give up nursing 100% I'm at a point where I'm feeling as if my body is not a shell or a functional item.
I'm ready to show it off a bit. It's as if Spring has brought a rebirth of sorts for me physically. I'm not talking about dressing scantily but wearing occasional heels or showing a little skin.
I'm wearing skirts now. I haven't worn skirts regularly since I gave birth.
I guess this is he next step in my physical and emotional recovery and preparation. I know it sounds absurdly late but some other moms I spoke to said they felt the same.
Not all of us can be a Hollywood mom and seem to be back to pre-baby confidence of her body 3 months post partum.
More importantly this is a sign from my mind and body that I may be moving towards being ready for next steps.
This in way means I'm ready to give my body back up for incubation right away but I am one step closer.
