Monday, August 24, 2009

Dare update, An Engagement, A First & Modern Parenting

Ok, sorry for being a stranger.

A lot has happened.

First, I am working on my next Love Dare. Actually part of the exercise is to read the bible in earnest. I decided to read John and read a chapter a day. The best time I found was while TG (yes, she's a Toddler now!) is nursing to sleep. After we say our prayers and she's settled with eyes closed and arms wrapped around her lovey, I read a chapter.

On to developments, I'll speak of family in second. First, my brother got engaged! I'm spreading happiness to everyone! My brother planned this for awhile but it all came down to yesterday's end of summer bbq.

In front of friends, family and her family, my brother asked his girlfriend to marry him. I'm so proud of my little brother. He'll always be my baby brother, you know.

Onto the nuclear family...

I got a tickle in my throat.

Three days later, DH got a tickle and congestion. He developed a cold. His sinuses were so blocked, he gave in and did neti. I'm so proud of him. He's still battling it out and was a real trooper when I even dragged him out to the BBQ. If it wasn't a big event, I would have told him to stay home but it was an important day. Thank you DH.

This morning (ok, last night), TG had a rough night of it and sounded wheezy. This morning, I confirmed it, TG has her first cold. Her nose is all crusty and she's just miserable. She's probably achy and tired and her throat might even hurt.

She was whining last night and kept nursing, I suppose to help ease and throat soreness.

To make matters worse, for the first time, TG didn't want me to go as I headed off to work. She kept unpacking my bag and clinging onto me like a starfish.

As I headed out the door and waved my usual 'Bye Bye', she reached out to me and said, 'Momma!'

She settled down soon after though which made me feel better. It would have killed me to hear her crying as I entered the elevator.

So now she is resting.

The big question is what do I do for a toddler who has a cold? With an adult, I've been through it many a times so I have my checklist. As soon as DH said he felt ill, I ran through the list of ingredients for my chicken/veggie soup and made giant vat of my liquid gold concotion. I keep the liquid gold in full supply in the house until everyone feels better.

But a toddler is not going to eat soup. I tried. Stop laughing.
Maybe I can make the broth and mix it with potatoes to make it thick.
At least she's eating the egg noodles I cook in stock. That should help, I suppose.
She's also eating the carrots that are in the soup.

I plan to nurse her more often to help fight the bug and we've been using the NoseFrida to pull out the boogies but other than that I suppose I can only help her get some rest and nutrients in her system.

Oh, funny thing happened at the end of summer bbq, I overheard my mom tell my brother's soon to be in-laws that my husband and I practice parenting on a strict schedule.

I thought it humorous because we actually do the opposite but it showed how confusing Attachment Parenting can be to those who lean towards conventional parenting.

DH and I try to follow AP practice recommendations. We strive to be responsive parents.

Because we strive to be responsive, we've noticed cues to her circadian rhythm. We know that she likes to be in bed around 6pm now. We also know that she enjoys a nap anywhere between 1-1.5 hours after lunch. With me, she likes downtime (cuddles no napping) before lunch.

So when folks ask us to do something and it conflicts with bedtime, we generally pass on the offer. We're a bit more open regarding her naps as I can always wear her and she'll happily nap on me while we're out.

I'd like to say we are protective of our child's time but to an outsider, I suppose, it does look like we're on a schedule. I guess that's why some folks find AP so confining. I think it's the opposite. I believe AP is about openness and acceptance of multiple methods. In other words, you can't say I'm going to do it this way and call it a day. I may be new to parenting but the first thing that struck me is that what might work today may not work tomorrow so don't throw all your eggs in one basket.

Still with all methods, you do have die hards and I suppose they can sometimes feel like they are the most vocal.

I don't even try to explain it anymore. I figure unless, 1) you are a current parent to an under 12 and/or 2) don't have any parent guilt (hahahahahhahaha), schedules/routines/cues will all look the same to you.

AP may be one of the oldest methods of parenting out there but it's still pretty foreign & considered modern in some parts. This is made more apparent in a society that treasures independence versus interdependence.