I said I am sometimes impatient but the other issue I’m embarrassed to admit I have is a problem deeply rooted within my family that I’m tackling day by day. I call it the guilt complex. You make up excuses out of guilt, sometimes out of fear of confrontation and you become too accommodating or too nice.
This doesn’t help anyone. Heck, it makes things worse. Parents who do it raise kids that lack confidence and self-reliance. There is a confidence grown and developed when you know you can do something. Something as simple as cleaning your own room gives you a sense of accomplishment.
I’m not as bad as other people in my family but I do know that it was something I inherited and I try to overcome everyday. It leads me to butt heads with family members at times.
Guilt and fear of confrontation are terrible roadblocks. No one should ever have to rationalize asking a person to take out the garbage. He works too hard. She’s always tired. I’m always working and I’m usually tired yet I still manage to keep a decent home, stay relatively healthy and have a good personal life.
It ticks me off when people begin making excuses for others. I know I have done it. I do it all the time. I’m a Libra and indecisiveness and rationalization is my skin. I just think people need to be more realistic and honest with themselves. Rationalizing to avoid a fist in the face is ok. Rationalizing to avoid the truth is not.
Related tags: relationships, enabling, spoiling, fear of confrontation, failure to launch