Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Stories my parents told me I thought were fact

1. There is a robotic bunny that lives in the Holland Tunnel.


mom: We didn't want you to be afraid of the tunnel.

pg: But I wasn't afraid of the tunnel. I never even thought to be afraid. I told my classmates at school about the bunny and they all looked at me like I was nuts. I think I was more scared of a robotic bunny than a tunnel.

mom: Oh, well. At least you weren't afraid of the tunnel.

2. The giant water towers we see are actually giant bones.


mom: Giant bones sounded like a good story.

pg: Didn't you think I'd wonder what huge beast would leave giant bones halfway implanted into the ground? I think I was more freaked out about giant carcasses.

3. If I don't eat my crusts, my uncle will spank me.

pg: Mom, I was nearly as tall as Uncle Stephen when you threatened me. How could I have believed that was a legitimate threat.

mom: I don't know. I think I even laughed when I told you that.

4. The best way to dry your glasses is under a hair dryer.

pg: Thanks for the first degree burns. Did you and dad really have to tag team me like that.

mom: I don't even remember doing that. Sounds funny.

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