Dear neighbor who is cooking the cabbage:
I’m not one to complain. In fact, I like that I live in a building filled with people who enjoy cooking but it’s been over an hour now. I need to ask you to kindly finish cooking whatever it is you are making.
You are making my apartment smell like dog farts. Yes, trust me when I say dogs fart. Seriously, even the dogs are alarmed by the wafting scent of sulfur that periodically drift into our living room. Put a lid on it, will you? Are you using enough water?
I like cabbage but this is getting to be unbearable. All I keep doing is staring at my dog with suspicion. The dogs stare right back offended at my presumption.
Related tags: cabbage