Lrudlrick and I live on different time zones. Lrudlrick lives on Lrudlrick time. Lrudlrick time is usually 2hours past fashionably late.
Now I’m not Ms. Punctual either. However, I try desperately to never be later than ½ hour for any function.
So when I tell you that I lie to my husband sometimes to get us nearly on-time to an event, don’t get angry and indignant.
I didn’t tell my husband our boat ride to the island was set to leave at 7pm. I knew if I did he’d never get us out of the house. I thought giving us 5 hours for a 3.5 hour drive would be sufficient. I was wrong.
L:What time do you want to head out?
pg:12ish/1ish. In retrospect, my 'ishes' made it seem too casual. I should have been more exact.
L:ok.
We left our city at 3pm. Now, I say city because, it doesn’t really mean we’re leaving when we're packed in the car and leaving our block. The trip doesn't begin until he’s finished driving us to the bank, going to the car wash, getting gas and an oil change and stopping at the deli to pick up a Snapple Diet Peach Iced Tea.
The drive takes 3 hours without traffic but since most of it is spent on the I-95 in Connecticut, we’re going to be sitting in traffic for at least 20 minutes. Plus, if there is an accident anywhere on I-95 or Rte 1, we’ll be stuck in a parking lot so you can understand my nervousness.
Every hour that passes, I’m getting more and more panicky. I try to keep my mind busy by listening to Live 8 and reading of all books, The Time Traveler’s Wife.
L:The Who sounds great! Hey, think we’ll get to take our car so we can listen to Pink Floyd at Live 8?
pg:We’re barely going to get there on time. I doubt we’ll have time to load our car.
L:What’s the big deal? You’re stressing out. We can catch the next boat. You always stress out on these drives.
It didn’t dawn on him until my brother direct connects us to say if we miss the boat, we’ll have to wait until tomorrow to get to the island.
Now, I’m really stressed out. I’m always stressed on the ride to Rhode Island. Why? Because, when I say we need to leave at 12, we leave at 3pm! Next time we go, I’m going to have to tell him we need to be out the door the day before!
The hysterics hit the hilt after a blow out fight which led to Lrudlrick missing the exit.
L:See you’re so stressed you can’t see straight and missed the exit.
pg:You’re driving.
L:Yes, but you know you’re better with directions.
pg:Well, I was trying to read the directions. I wasn’t looking at the road.
L:Because you’re so stressed you can’t see straight.
pg:How the hell am I supposed to read the directions and stare at the road? You’re driving!
muthafunga:(on direct connect beep Guys. Guys. You there? You’re cutting it close guys.beep
Lrudlrick pulls to the side of the road and I took over. Pantrygirl drove 90 mph on Route 1. Like a mother bird searching for her baby chick, I honed in and found my way to the boat basin. I was frustrated and exhausted but I made it.
We get to the boat basin just in time to hear the boat signal last call. Lrudlrick and my brother grabbed the backpacks, kitchen kit and bikes and booked to my brother’s car. I parked the car in the first slot I saw. I’ve never hauled ass like I did that evening. Dragging my purse and beach bag, I run onto the boat frazzled and in need of a stiff drink.
One hour later, I was on the island. Sanctuary...
