People ask me how I feel about the situation with my mom. Sad. That’s how I feel. I feel horrible that it has come down to this but I also realize that I cannot continue to allow her to affect me the way she does. No one can know what she expects of her children. She has grown a kidney stone of anger inside of her.
I didn’t think that her not sharing Easter with me would affect me as much as it has. I’m not sorry I didn’t beg her to come. I wouldn’t have wanted her to be there if she didn’t want to. It hit me like a ton of bricks Saturday night when I realized my friends and family were happier and had more desire to see me and visit me than my mother. I can only hope that things can only get better.
This weekend was a wonderful weekend. OCD pantrygirl was fulfilled, family pantrygirl was content and Donna Reed pantrygirl was satisfied. Hubby and I miraculously completed 80% of our spring cleaning. The apartment is so clean of clutter, it prompted my husband to change his tune about us having little space and needing to look for a house. We’re still looking but he’s not as gung ho about moving so soon after our last move.
Friends visited us on Saturday evening and I spent a wonderful time catching up. Family was visited on Sunday. I like big family gatherings. They remind me of my childhood and annual trips for family reunions. After the 80’s, those disappeared. Now I only see my entire family for funerals and weddings. Sure we meet up occasionally, if one visits, but those are infrequent. I miss them. So when we get together with Lrudlrick’s family, I get a sense of that again.
Finally, Donna Reed pantrygirl was in full force. I didn’t get to make the 4 pastries I wanted to but I did make three: fudge, raspberry coffee cake & chocolate dipped jam cookies. I didn’t get to bring the fudge because it hadn’t set yet. My co-workers were thankful for this and have been munching down the fudge.
BTW, have you ever noticed that in the 50’s, everything was ok, as long as there was food? I was watching Howard Hawk’s Monkey Business again and couldn’t stop laughing at Ginger Roger’s character. Whenever she couldn’t solve her husband’s dilemmas, she’d offer him food. If it wasn’t eggs, it was coffee. Everything looks better with a full stomach. Lrudlrick laughed and told me I belong in the 50’s. I’m constantly making something to eat for him. He swears I’m fattening him up for the kill.
All in all, I had a very nice weekend but Lrudlrick and I can’t wait for a lazy weekend, a weekend filled with sitting on one’s ass, flipping through the Times and doing absolutely nothing.