Friday, November 12, 2004

Home, Work and Self: The Balancing Act

It's been awhile I know.

This week has been another hectic one. This time, I've been busy
on all ends, work, home and self.

Funny how all this news on Arafat has come and go. An editorial
in the Post or was it the News said it best.

He's a terrorist. There is no need to fill our airwaves with his
death and illness. One notification shall suffice.

MIL said she's coming in December now. If you all know by now,
she's been saying she'll be coming down since June.

She's serious now. She's given me a date. She didn't mention
whether her husband was coming so I assume she's coming solo and
I took days off already to take her around town for visits and
errands.Lrudlrick think otherwise but has decided to take days off too.

At the same time, we submitted our names to a home security show
for the Discovery channel and they seem interested. Lrudlrick is
coordinating it. Supposedly, they break in to our apartment steal
our stuff then make some security adjustments and try breaking in
again. So pretty much, we have to allow ourselves to be violated.

Baby cousin's getting baptized this weekend, mom is in San Fran
visiting her in-laws and brother is dating a princess.

On the home front, I finally cleaned the house. God what I would do for
a maid to come once a week. But usually it's not that bad. It
only got to the point of disorganization after I did battle with
a cold that zapped my OCD into submission. At one point I had
clothing on the dining room table (I abhor clothing, clean or
dirty, being in a place it shouldn't be. This all comes from
watching my mom leave clothes all over the living room, porch and
spare bedroom.).

Then while I was still ill and hopped up on Nyquil (Blue pills rock!)
I woke up from what I thought was Chinese water torture.
I ran out of bed and into the bathroom where I saw a waterfall stream
down from the ceiling.

We had notified the super four weeks ago that we didn't want to wait
until the ceiling caved in. He yes-ed us to death and now at 6:30
in the morning I'm racing to get a bucket and towels to dry off
the floor. Lrudlrick was livid and called the super's cell. I
called in and waiting at home for the super. We even got the keys
from our neighbors so they could go upstairs to investigate.

Finally at 1pm the super shows up and after several phone calls
and my Lrudlrick running home, we had the managing agent, board
president and super scrambling to ensure us that it would get
fixed tomorrow am.

"Is it an emergency?"

"I don't know what you call an emergency, but water shooting out of my
ceiling into a bucket isn't what I consider quality of living." - Lrudlrick.

So now, I have to take another day off so they can scrape and
re-paint our bathroom ceiling. I bet I'll have to mix the paint.
We mix our wall color paint with standard white to avoid that
stark "OH MY GOD, IT'S THE CEILING" look.

So essentially, because of my illness, the household chores of the week were
pushed back.

Hence, laundry wasn't picked up until yesterday.

Dry cleaning hasn't been picked up all week.

Groceries have not been ordered.

Dog Food is non existent.

Presents for baptism and baby shower (for a co-worker) not bought.

Christmas cards not designed. (Yes, anal retentive self has decided that

I'll make my cards this year. I'm such an ass.)

Not to mention, family wall hasn't even begun to take shape since last week.

Bro is lending me his scanner so I don't ruin the older pics.

And now that mom's visiting in-laws, I need to haul my ass to her house to
pick up the scanner and some capes she knitted for a friend. Oh, yes,
she's gone loco knitting scarves and capes. So I figure, why not
sell them for her. Which reminds me, I need to call Bro to make
sure he's home before he leaves for the camping trip so I can
pick them and his scanner up.

On the self front, I've been busy reading and doing some introspection.
It's hard to do when Lrudlrick is around. I try not to be so self absorbed
around him.

On the work front, I've realized that my projects are never
ending projects. This realization, of course, came after a very
hectic and frustrating day at work. I kept feeling like I
couldn't accomplish anything. With that feeling plus the need to
take days off of work, I felt I was being pushed at home and I
was really pissed about that.

I know it's minor compared to the push I'll eventually feel when we have kids
but I hated that fact that I had to decide and the decision had to be home.
This made me angrier. I was choosing work over home and that's just wrong.
I know my job isn't a high profile, "OH MY GOD, SHE'S THE ONLY
ONE WITH THE DEACTIVATION CODES!" kind of job. But I pride myself
in my work and the ability to do my job above and beyond. Which
lead me to ask, "Why?" Sure I can say monetary but to be
truthfully, they'd pay me just the same even if I did half the
work I do and at half the effort. So is it my home life? No. I
love my home life and Lord knows I've got plenty at home that I
need to do so it's not like I'd be sitting on my ass. I honestly
don't know right now why I was so upset that I had to choose home
over work. Maybe it was that I had no choice in the matter. I'll
figure it out eventually.